Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize