Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
two words: eviction party
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Randomize