12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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