she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
