he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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