So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
