Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
