..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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