Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
