I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
