He disabled his match.com account in front of me
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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