When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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