I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
