his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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