Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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