There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
