my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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