He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I'm always down for nudity.
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