no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize