Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
