I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
