i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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