Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
