she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
