I met the friendliest cop last night
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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