Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
