Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
