Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
