My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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