She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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