# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
