i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
