Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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