ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
