It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
