Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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