So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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