Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
we made out on top of his cat.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
