When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Can I color on your dick again?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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