I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
