You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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