yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Drunk is a universal language darling
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