It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
It's no shave November. This is our time.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
