So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I'm passing your future prison.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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