I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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