dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
