put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
