question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
