Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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