She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
