i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
