No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
